4x5 color negatives... a no-existant process of development

So, I'm unable to find anywhere in Moncton to develop 4x5 color negatives. It’s sad how people today have all converted to the digital world. It hasn’t occurred to anybody that digital photography is completely not the same as traditional?... It’s sad to find out that artists like me who take traditional photography seriously isn’t able to develop a simple good quality 4x5 color negative. I’m trying to create an impression of lights into a masterpiece but am limited because of technology. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against it. I just don’t see why film photography has to disappear, because, let’s face it, it soon will and only artists like me will try to keep it alive. Struggling.

Film photography has a completely different quality to digital. It’s tangible, it’s real. You don’t use a darkroom to load up your pictures on a computer waiting for it to do the work. Oh no sir! Darkrooms are used to actually witness the process of development through lights and chemicals. As for black and white, you can actually see the image appear right before your eyes… it’s like magic! Why would we want to let this all go?

Of course we all find that the traditional ways take more time, but so what? Time is all we have. If you think about it, technology is what makes everything go faster. I guess once you go fast, you don’t find any thrill in going slow anymore. But going slow may be what makes a better quality picture. Think about it.

Catching up!!

Ok, so I keep neglecting this blog like crazy! But that’s mostly because I started getting pretty busy by the end of Marsh and most of April finishing up my Visual Arts degree and preparing my ultimate AWESOME expo!!... Ok, so I wasn’t the only one showing my art, but hey, I put a lot of work into it!
Alright, so here’s what’s been going on: I’ve been finishing up on my projects in photography and painting and yes, I still managed to find myself time to eat!
In Painting, I’ve been concentrating more on the “fear” of trains, while in photography; it was more on the subject of “love”. All in all, everything turned out pretty great! Here are a few pictures of my work. Enjoy!

I'll add more of my art over time. I don't wanna overload here.

Other than that, I will be updating more often now since I have so many ideas for this summer… I’ve been watching CN go by most nights now and I’ve found inspiration coming out of my ass!! Its insane! Plus, I’m super excited to work on more 4x5 negatives… yes, remember, I’m more into the traditional stuff. But don’t worry, I’m not completely outdated here, I do have my Canon PowerShot A460 with me at all times in case I miss out! So, stay tuned!

Random nothings (1)

Every day I walk the same route to my faculty and occasionally stop to enjoy its familiar air. I take pictures now and then since I’m one to admire its random beauty. There’s nothing special about this path, nothing intriguing. It’s not even long enough sometimes to go through a whole song on my iPod. I just take notice of small changes and random things that peak my interest. Like today… I noticed all the cars in the parking lot seemed stuck in ice.





Other times I notice the sky change colors… or the just the plain ole’ winter weather that gets in my way is taken into photograph…










I love how you can document specific moments into the memory bank with a camera. Although sometimes its nothing compared to the real thing…

A Photographer's Journey

I’ve come across a wonderful book called Trains: a Photographer’s Journey. I thought that I was one of very few photographers who had more of an artistic view on the way I photographed trains since I couldn’t find anyone else who wasn’t a railfan when taking pictures of those machines. But with this book, I discovered Graeme Outerbridge, a photographer who journeyed the world just for the simple pleasure of traveling on trains of all types and photographing them. After flipping through the pages, I realized he had a very abstract way of representing these locomotives. His color photography on these many types of trains from Canada to Spain to Australia is quite vivid and rustic. Some of his abstract photography concentrates more on lines, colors and shapes, and others on movements. Not to think that this book is entirely abstract; there are some very crisp clear shots of trains out in the distance with all its striking beauty and sceneries.

I feel the need to write this wonderful citation from his introduction since I feel that I can relate:

“I’m not the typical train photographer, nor do I have the railfan’s exact metaphysics concerning every detail of railroading. My approach was to treat each train as a new experience and let the journey reveal hidden facts. I wanted to find a visual language to express the experience of train travel. I did my best to capture the sense of movement in my photographs, but of course the sounds of the road and the smell of diesel are missing. A train whistle in the night conjures dreams. One feels an excitement of possibilities; maybe it’s the call to adventure or the promise of escape from troubles that feel inescapable.”

While I wait... again

It’s hard to find exactly what interests me in the freight train when I photograph it. I’ve gone a couple of nights now to clear my head and hope to catch the train… I had no luck. While I’m waiting, I think of how I could connect it to my model photography. I’ve been in the studio for a while now, changing the scene of things and posing models instead of trains. I’m trying to find that link that makes my two favourite subjects come together like a fairy tale. I know it sounds ridiculous to try and associate the train to a man who’s love is a real live woman. I think it relates to my personal life… I’ve inspired myself from my own love life. I’m not sure why… but I do know that its good inspiration…
I’ve also inspired a little of Mapplethorpe’s nude photography, although I’m not into taking completely nude pictures yet. I find ponctum in them. The way the female bodies are positioned, the shadows that fall onto their bare skin… it’s quite intriguing… I might inspire from him when it comes to working more and more in the studio… I’m not sure why I’ve been cooped up inside that room for photographing, but I think it’s because I’m not very fond of the snow outside right now… winter engulfs my photographs in white. White is everywhere! … Trains, you’ll have to wait…

A new subject...

I’ve started taking an interest in photographing models lately. Ever since I’ve experienced heartbreak, I’ve come across so many ideas for new projects in photography. At first, it all came from an inspirational piece of music such as Coheed and Cambria’s Keeping the Blade, but then I started finding a whole other source of inspiration while actually photographing the models. I usually go with girls because I tend to relate more to them as subjects than men. I’m not exactly sure why that is, but I’m taking a guess that it has to do with the fact that I know a female body more than a male’s. I also seem to be more interested in the whole dressing up part. A woman tends to have a much more complex wardrobe, as we know it culturally. I just plain ole’ love to be able to control the way they look and move. It’s like reverting back to childhood and playing with dolls, like Barbies. I always took hours figuring out what those little plastic women would wear for my perfect love story. I usually took so much time, that after I finally found the perfect outfit I wouldn’t even play with it after. I would just set the doll down and admire it for a few minutes, then start all over again. I took great pleasure in doing this for hours on end sometimes.
As I grew older, I started taking an interest in dressing myself up, like any typical girl; I would sometimes take a long time figuring out what to wear during any normal day. I guess you could say it came from dressing up those dolls. But, I did have certain bodily issues and could never quite fit in all the pretty things I wanted to. I always wanted to dress up, make-up and feel very lady-like on some occasions but it never seemed to feel right. So I guess, that’s where I started enjoying photographing other girls in what I would fantasize wearing. I think that there’s a very strong element of seduction when it comes to posing women in certain clothing. Or maybe it’s the way they’re positioned, legs open, legs cross, mouth slightly open, chin up, whatever the pose, I think it’s a new line of interest for my photography that could lead to something very captivating…

Bjork, you are my source of enlightenment...

Since Christmas, I’ve found new appreciation for the Icelandic singer, Bjork. I’m not sure why all of a sudden her music started intriguing me, but I do know that I love some of her lyrics. It seems that, while listening to her songs, I have this changed source of inspiration when it comes to photographing. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but it’s like I feel different towards the subject that I’m shooting while I have her playing in my headphones. It seems to calm and sooth me in a way that I can’t really describe with words. Its like, all reality ceases to exist and I’m at peace with myself…



“I'm no f*cking Buddhist
But this is enlightenment” – Alarm call, Bjork

Train as Man

So here I’m reading on Andrew J. Birrell’s article of The North American Boundary Commission and I realise how photographing for the railways was of significant importance back in the late 1800s. Of course, this was all done in the process to actually build possible passages for the railways by surveying and exploring the land. He quotes, “It may be said that now no report of an exploration is considered complete unless accompanied by photographs.” It’s a very interesting line that I’ve put some thought to…

So, is what I observe through my viewfinder some kind of “report of an exploration? And then, once photographed, is it complete? It all sounds so scientific! But then again, photography was used, in the beginning, as visual documentations and was “indispensable and highly technical” to surveys, therefore in my opinion, a very scientific implement.

But things have changed since then and I don’t wish for people to study my photographs scientifically or as any ordinary documentation. I would like for them to look at my images as if a story is being told, like in fairy-tale-like or fable sort of way.

Take my trains for example, even thought I photograph them; I tend to create and leave a sort of mystery so the spectator has this aspect to question. I don’t photograph them like any common “railfan” because I don’t look for the good crisp quality of a calendar shot. (Although, in all do respect, “railfanning” is a very fun hobby.) As an artist, I wish to bring in a much more cultural take on this object to which I associate more humanlike characteristics. In other words, as a machine, the train has a certain rugged, aggressive and forceful quality with all its metal and steel components to which these aspects are represented culturally with masculinity that I wish to capture through my photographs.

What’s that you ask? Did I just represent trains to what we know culturally with masculinity? … as man?

Think about it…


BIRRELL, Andrew J., "The North American Boundary Commission – Three Photographic Expeditions, 1872-74", History of Photography, Volume 20, Mumber 2, Summer 1996: p. 113-121

Catching the train (take 1)

I was finally able to get my video last night. After waiting two hours in the 0° cold, I thought to myself: Oh, the things I do for art. I was not going to leave until I got my shot. And what a satisfying feeling I once the train had passed.

I really had some time to think within my waiting time, mostly of my uncle. He’s a brilliant photographer who lives for his photography. He’ll wake up really early in the morning before the sun rises and wait for the lighting to be just right on whatever subject he’s shooting. He’ll sometimes spend entire days outside just waiting for the perfect moment. He does this everyday, photographing mostly nature. I’m thinking he must have acquired some great patience skills. He’s a very passionate and dedicated man and what amazes me the most is that he’s neither an artist nor a professional. He did not go to college or university yet he probably knows as much or maybe more than the average photo student. He talks almost like a professor.

So there I was standing around with a chill, and I kept thinking that I must have inherited his patience. I don’t know how I did it, but I managed to stay out, determined to catch my train. I guess that’s what good photography is all about.